Do you ever think to yourself that you probably have too many kids? I do. I think I might already have too many. Of course, I love them too much so there's nothing to be done now. (That's my attempt to be witty while in a cranky mood.) I wish I wanted 5 or 6 kids, but I don't. My kids are hard. Even my babysitter called tonight after about 30 minutes and said, "Nolan is being hard." And then she cried. And then I went home. Bless her heart for even saying that she'd give it a try. I want to cry about every 30 minutes, too, when the boys are hard. It's a good thing they still give me a big hug and kiss each night to remind me that they like me. They make me tired so I'll go to bed.
But one more thought: It's hard being the mom of a difficult kid. I've heard the way other ladies talk about "that" kid and the way he or she is not disciplined. You all know what I'm taking about: "If I was his mom, I'd....." or "If I was his mom, I wouldn't let that go on." Well, kids come with their own personalities and it doesn't always mean that mom and dad aren't trying their best. I'm more careful now when I think about difficult kids since I have one (maybe two, but the jury is still out). Next time I'm with the mom of another difficult child I'll know that she's trying her best and she's probably really tired. And Nolan, when you read this some day I hope you know that I love you more than you could ever know.
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Tired
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6 comments:
Oh! I'm so sorry Kenz! They really are the sweetest boys. Underneath all the mischief and attitude. I LOVE those little boys as if they were my own. And they are they are so lucky to have you for their mother. You are a GREAT mother. Why were you getting a babysitter anyways? You should have brought them to me! Rob didn't even get home until 9:30! We would LOVE to have them over here.
Love ya Kenz! Hope your day is better today!
I'm sorry!! I think you are a wonderful mother. You love your boys and that is the most important thing!
Oh, Kenz...I just want to say I empathize with you. The fact that you would even write a blog saying how hard you are trying and how much you love them despite the "hard times" shows what a great mom you are. There are some nights that I go to bed and just have to pray "Please help me to do better tomorrow." I love the comment about big families starting with girls. Haha. May be true. Kind of like the "If I'd had the 2nd one first, there wouldn't have been a 2nd." Lol.
Oh Kenz, what a hard, honest, but sweet post. It's obvious that you love your boys. I admire your patience. All moms have been in situations where they have felt embarassed about what their child is doing, or feel like they have no control of a situation. I think if a mom says they haven't, then they are lying.
We all know our kids have their own spirits and personalities. Your boys know that you love them, and someday they will grow up and appreciate all you've done and continue to do.
Kenz...I truly know what you are going through with your boys because I went through it all too. My boys were really hard when they were Nolan and Ezra's age!!! When I go back and read my journal I sound exactly like you...so frustrated!!! You love them so much but there are days you don't like them at all...haha! I still feel that way sometimes. I wish I had some good advice for you but I really don't...I just know that before you realize it they will be 19 and leaving you for two years. You are such a good mom and I admire you so much!!!!
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